Saturday, August 6, 2011

Language Usage - A Zone of its Own

A warm welcome to one "pickypear" who became the first commentor on this blog.  You may want to read that comment following my opening post, A By-way To Ramble.

First, Ms. or Mr. Pear, you did not tend to ramble at all, and second - if you are "picky," at least you are also correct!  Authority on the English language I am NOT, however I have always enjoyed the usage of our language which offers a vast array of colors and tones for us to freely apply to the canvas of communication. 

Your criticism of television personalities who abuse pronouns (among the many language missteps) is absolutely true, and this is poor handling of the responsibilities of broadcast types.  You and I are just two of the millions who cringe when hearing these glaring errors.  And though there may be more millions who fail to even notice the mistakes, this is still an egregious miscarriage of responsibility by those who speak to us through the tube.  The folks who may not notice the incorrect usage are still being hurt by it.  They should be learning better speech by osmosis, but instead, they are getting the message that poor usage is everywhere and that correcting it is unimportant.

But here in the Neutral Zone, there is a giant consideration I must approach.  Within our interpersonal communications, restraint is an all-important trait.  I have learned this the hard way, and I would bet that Pear has dealt with it also.  There is no shortage of language blunders being committed day in and day out by those in our immediate circles of activity.  The tip of my tongue is near to falling off due to the many times I've had to bite it.  Why stop myself from saying something corrective when I hear horrible language mistakes? 

Simple courtesy is a good enough reason.  Of course there are others, such as offending a boss by correcting his/her speech could get one fired.  But my usual decision to hold back from correcting someone's errors in language usage is the need to keep the peace.  Not only is it good to avoid direct offense when we can, we sometimes cause indirect and unwanted interruptions to others by allowing a wince or other facial expression to cause a speaker to stumble.  A husband sees the sour look cover his wife's face upon hearing him hit a sour note of usage, and he loses track of his thoughts, maybe wonders if he has food on his face or his fly is open.  Any possibility of completing his sentence, perhaps speaking with someone he considers important to his world, is lost.

Then there is the old request, "Please tell me when I say that wrong," coming from a loved one.  Do we actually take this to mean the person wants to be corrected?  Mistake!  If a mate is to ever take this request seriously and try to express that criticism, I advise waiting until a distant moment and perhaps one that is being enjoyed over a fine wine.  Actually, for most people, there is almost no way to properly correct a loved one's speech.  Only the accomplished communicating couples can pull this off.

I have also noted that some people whose speech is peppered with imperfections seem to make friends more easily than those of us who are somewhat persnickety (I had to try it!) in our efforts to speak properly.  Could it be that our attention to this correctness motif makes us less interesting or perhaps intimidating to others?  Hard to say.  In my experience though, as long as I am staying true to myself and my own desire to use language properly, I can confidently speak with most people comfortably.  Others' manner of speaking can not detract from my own, and I need not try to improve theirs.  I have even become adept in the ability to curb my tendency to cringe in front of others who hit clinkers of speech.  That old expression, "It's the thought that counts," may be the thing to remember here.  Perhaps an unusual way to apply the expression, but consider this: if I am too caught up in the usage flaws in someone's speech, I may completely miss out on some information  that could be very important.

But really, you people who work in television are paid to present words to our ears and you almost always have the advantage of seeing the whole business written out!  At least you should make sure your scripts are prepared with correct language usage!  On this point, I can not be neutral!

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